Are you someone who longs for more self-confidence? Do you see the people around you as having more self-confidence than you do, and wonder how?
What would you say if I told you that most people have the same thoughts? Most people would like more self-confidence, even the ones who already appear to have it in spades. I am going to set out some very simple ways you can build more self-confidence, starting today.
Dress the Part
The way you dress plays a big part in how confident you feel or not. You need to be dressed the way you want to be perceived and if you feel good in your clothes, it will come across. So review your wardrobe and anything particularly outdated, stained, ill-fitting or just plain ugly, toss in the rubbish or give it to charity.
It's important to understand that part of building your confidence means looking the best you can. If you're a man, ensure you have a regular haircut and are clean-shaven. If you're a woman, make sure you have an easy to maintain hairstyle and that your make up is done well, but subtle. Keep the heavy makeup and bright colours for the weekends and after hour's parties.
Walk Faster, With Purpose
Confident, successful people walk with purpose. Have a look next time you're standing on a busy street. Examine what they are doing. Do they look like their heading somewhere important? That's what you're aiming for. You don't want to be one of the people shuffling along looking down at their feet, with seemingly nowhere to go. So put some pep in your step!
Good posture is important and something you should be conscious about. People who sit slumped over their desk, looking lethargic and bored, exhibit an absolute lack of self-confidence. By being conscious about how you carry yourself you will instantly boost your self-confidence.
Make Eye Contact
Eye contact is another vitally important element of self-confidence. By not looking people in the eye when you have a conversation you are displaying a lack of belief in yourself, and what you are saying. Making direct eye contact can make some people feel very uncomfortable, but like anything else it takes practice.
People who make eye contact with others are perceived as being more powerful, personable, competent, likeable and emotionally stable. If those reasons alone don't make you want to practice making eye contact, then I don't know what will!
Eliminate Self Doubt and Be Grateful
Our minds are crazy things. For instance, you make up your mind that you are going to improve your self-confidence. You decide that you are going to do it, whatever it takes. But then your mind takes over and starts telling you all the reasons why you can't do it. It's like that little voice inside your head is completely against you! The way I like to deal with that little voice is to shut it down. Immediately!
I start putting together a list. This can be done anywhere. It's better if you can sit down with a pen and paper, but you can also do it in your head. Write down, or think about, 100 things you're grateful for. It sounds strange I know, but the minute you start thinking about things you're grateful for your mind will start focussing on that rather than telling you what it thinks you can't do.
Stop the Gossip!
Starting today, stop engaging in gossip. We have all been guilty of gossip and speaking badly of others at some point in our lives. What we have to understand that gossiping does real damage, not just to person we are gossiping about, but to ourselves.
If you are around people who are, simply try changing the subject. If that doesn't work, walk away. If you can't change the subject or walk way, a great way to deal with it is to praise the subject of the gossip. When someone says something bad about a person, come back with something good about them.
By looking for the best in others, you indirectly bring out the best in yourself, and those around you. You will also become more confident and likeable in the process.
Being fit, active and healthy will most certainly help to increase your confidence, because to build confidence you need to feel good. Eating well and regular exercise are easy things you can do to start feeling better about yourself.
Start limiting your caffeine and sugar intake as too much of these can lead you to feeling irritable and moody. Find other ways to satisfy these cravings.
Most people don't exercise because they don't make it a priority. Once you do, you will fit it into your day no matter how busy you are. So take the time. This is all about you remember!
Learn Public Speaking
Learning public speaking is a great skill to have. Not only is it a great addition to your professional CV, but it's also something that will make you feel extremely accomplished. Public speaking is the number one fear in the world and if you can master this skill, your confidence will sky-rocket!
Get Out of Your Comfort Zone
Start doing at least one thing every day that makes you feel uncomfortable. It could be as simple as walking into a room full of strangers and introducing yourself to someone, or it could be as elaborate as sky diving.
The point of this is to take small steps every day, and by taking these small steps you will feel a sense of achievement for doing things you used to shy away from. Of course the more you do these things the easier they will become and you will wonder what all the fuss was about to begin with. Imagine how great you will feel about yourself? So push yourself out of your comfort zone every day!
Learn to Say "NO"
Don't feel you have to say 'yes' to everything. If you really don't have time to do something, or you simply just don't feel like it, say so. Confident people don't allow others to dictate everything they do.
You don't always have to be available to others just because they want you to be. Why put the added stress on yourself? This goes for your business life and your personal life. Having confidence means taking control of your life, every aspect of it.
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